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How Do I Stop You from Debiting My Customer for Declined Transactions?

I have a problem with you people tricking my customers into thinking money has been taken from their accounts when it has not. This happens whenever the customer is an a country or using a bank which refuses to let Visa verify their address. The transaction is flagged as suspicious for failing AVS, but a debit is put on their credit card statement anyway.

This has resulted in frequent complaints from people thinking they've been billed for services not provided. They send me screenshots of their credit card statements and demands that I provide them with the service they purchased or a refund. I have to explain that they have not really lost money but rather just had a temporary hold put on their account. Then I send them a Square link as an alternative. Unfortunately, they almost always think I've ripped them off at that point and won't consider doing business with me further until the holds are taken off their card. 

I don't mind having to send them a link and wait for them to complete the purchase, but I do have a problem with Authorize.net sabotaging the relationship with customers by debiting their accounts for declined transactions. To them that elevates me to the level of a scammer just trying to get them to authorize another transaction.

The debits are turning what should just be me saying sorry and sending them a link to them needing to wait days for the hold to be released.

I would just disable the rejection feature for non-US banks so that any transaction flagged for that reason is processed anyway, but the purchases are usually only for about $30 and my bank charges $45 per charge back even when I win. This means all anyone has to do to cost me $15 and the time necessary to win a chargeback dispute is use someone else's card. Since there is some controversy involved with my business I could see political opponents organizing to do such a thing in mass just to cause me problems.

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